Sunday, May 18, 2008

If I had a Cat Catapult

Let me start by saying that no cats have been harmed in the writing of this post. Our neighbor across the street has at least two cats. I'm not really a cat person for a couple of reasons, 1. Jamie is allergic to them, 2. when I was in high school my Mom had a cat that was pure evil. That cat would come to you and bite you for no reason. It even bit me one night while I was sound asleep; I flinched in a very fast motion and the cat flew across the room.(it never came into my room again). I guess it left me a little bitter toward cats.

Now back to the neighbor cats. They come over to our yard and try to sneak up on the birds that are feeding on the bird feeder outside our kitchen window. So being the good protector of the house and the property around it, I go out and chase the cat away. Chasing the cat away is done by tossing a pine cone or a stick at the cat.

Now we go into the dream sequence of the post. Imagine a wavy scene or a big thought cloud over my head now. There is a catapult my yard and a snare so when the cat is caught in the snare I can send the cat back to its home by way of airmail. I would have to yell "in coming" or "cats up" just as I launch the feline over the road and into the big bush in the neighbor's front yard. Just imagine the people driving down the road and seeing a flying cat. The driver of the car could have a wreck. Darn the dream bubble just popped.

Well for now I'll just have to keep chasing the cat away with the same old boring method.